A Very Merry Christmas
by Dormouse8
Summary: “So by together, you mean under the same roof?” The Malfoys and the Weasleys join together for a family Christmas, none of them will forget in a hurry.


**Disclaimer: I don't own a thing from the magical world of Harry Potter.**

**A/N: This was written for _Cally's Crazy Christmas Challenge, _over at the D/G Forum. See the list of the _'Crazy Must Haves'_ included at the end of the story.**

**I hope you enjoy, and have a very, Merry, Christmas. ;)**

* * *

**A Very Merry Christmas**

Draco had to admit, the idea of the 'perfect family Christmas' made him queasy. The garish decorations that were capable of ruining sight, the stupid songs that embedded themselves into one's head every year, and the spirit. Oh Merlin, the Christmas spirit. Practically the devil himself in Draco's eyes. Christmas spirit, the one thing that forced everyone to act as if they didn't hate each other's guts, and participate in the farce that was 'A Merry Christmas.'

Maybe it was all those Christmases at Malfoy Manor, which consisted of a strict routine of opening presents as a family, having an early Christmas lunch of venison with the trimmings, then attending one of his relatives balls, that involved expensive wine, foreign cuisines, and healthy, tolerable amounts of the 'Christmas spirit.' Yes, Draco thought those Christmases were acceptable, not too overbearing, yet not too dismal. With this perception of how a Christmas should be in his mind, it was no wonder that he almost fainted when his wife suggested the idea of a joint Christmas, one that would bring the Malfoys and the Weasleys together once and for all.

_Draco snorted. "So by together, you mean under the same roof?"_

_Ginny shot him a glare. "No, I mean your mother and father sitting out in the snow, while my family enjoy the turkey and stuffing." _

_Draco noted that his sarcasm had definite rubbed off on his wife. "Are you being serious Gin? It's evident our families don't get on." Ginny rolled her eyes as if he'd just announced something stupid. "Yes, I know this dear, but maybe celebrating Christmas together will spark up some friendships between the two families. I'm sure our mother's have a lot in common." _

_Draco didn't see how this was possible, but didn't mention this to his wife, as he didn't want to provoke her fiery temper. _

"_Maybe we should leave it till next year, and enjoy our first Christmas alone." Draco thought this was a tactful suggestion, and promptly decided that a Christmas spent alone with his undressed wife, would be one that would beat any other. _

"_But I've already invited my family."_

_Draco's perfect image of Ginny is nothing but a Santa hat shattered into a thousand pieces. _

"_But, Ginny-." She cut him off. " I suggest you invite your parents as soon as possible, so that they can't use an excuse of being invited elsewhere."_

_Draco stood from his chair, ready to argue his way out of a family Christmas. He opened his mouth, but was met with his wife's steeliest glare. Her eyes burned fiercely, and her mouth was pursed into an angry line. Draco knew better than to tangle with the temper once she had shot him this look and quickly closed his mouth. _

_Ginny perked up an eyebrow. _

"_Just off to owl my parents dear." Draco replied, and quickly exited the living room, to inform his parents of the Christmas from Hell. _

Hugging the bottle of Salazar's Burning Brandy closely to his chest, Draco closed his eyes as the thought of the day loomed ahead. The morning hadn't been so bad. Ginny had woken him early twirling mistletoe between her fingers, and presented him with a kiss. They'd exchanged presents, then retreated back to their bedroom for a stolen hour, before Ginny mentioned that she better start on the dinner.

Things suddenly went downhill, when Draco began to smell the bad omen of something burning, followed by his wife's strong cussing. He entered the kitchen to be met with choking smoke billowing from the stove in the corner, and Ginny, dishevelled and wild eyed. "It's only the sprouts, love." he mentioned, before quickly retreating to the drinks cabinet, as Ginny looked as if she was ready to castrate him. Grabbing the first bottle of liquid gold, he left his wife to her blackened sprouts, and hid himself away in the lounge with his good friend Salazar.

"Draco!" A familiar voice hissed in his ear. He opened his eyes and lifted the bottle to his lips. "Yes dear?" he answered, before taking another swig of bliss. "Please tell me you're not drinking yourself into oblivion, when our guests will be arriving any minute?" Anger laced Ginny's voice, and Draco thought it best not to answer. Besides, they shouldn't argue on Christmas day, and with that reasoning, he pressed his lips to the bottle and drank some more. "Draco!" the redhead hissed again, before grasping the bottle from his grip, and yanking it away from his mouth. With all the yanking, some of the brandy managed to slurp from the bottle and land right in Draco's lap.

"Ginny, when I'm sober I hate your family. So, for this day to go smoothly, I suggest you give me back the bottle." Ginny 's eyes blazed, and she tightened her grip on the bottle. Suddenly, the doorbell rang, and panic replaced the hatred in her eyes. "Oh Merlin, they're here!"

_**XXX**_

Draco scowled over at raven haired man, who was sharing an apparently hilarious joke with his wife. He just about managed to greet the Weasley's entrance with a forced smile, but upon seeing Potter on his doorstep, he had to ask him what the hell he was doing there. "I was invited." Came his reply, and he took off his coat and placed it in Draco's outstretched arms and sauntered off into the living room. It took all of Draco's willpower not to grab the smug bastard by the collar and throw him out in the snow. Besides, Draco was sure Ginny would throw him out shortly after, and he and Potter would then be dining together in the frozen front garden.

"Ginny, a word?" Draco asked, pulling her away from Harry and Ron. "Care to tell me, why I had no idea that we'd be entertaining Potter for Christmas?" Ginny rolled her eyes. "He's practically one of the family Draco, how could I not?"

"Easy. You could of said; You're not invited Harry." Ginny shot him a warning look. "And why the hell is Granger here? Surely she has parents?" Draco said, gesturing in the direction of a bushy haired girl who was linking Charlie. "She's engaged to my brother, Draco. Don't be so childish. Surely you can put up with their company for a few hours?" Draco frowned at his wife, making her smile. "I like it when you frown." She said, bringing a hand up to rest on his cheek. Draco liked were this was going. "You could of at least mentioned it Gin." he said defeated, turning his eyes wide onto her own, as he snaked his arm around her waist. "Let it go, and I'll give you a very special present tonight." Came her sultry reply, only loud enough for Draco to hear. She gave him a wicked grin, and flounced over to Hermione, leaving him alone. _Bingo_, Draco thought, amazed at his own abilities.

_**XXX**_

Downing another glass of average mead, Draco turned to face his father. It was surprisingly easy getting the Malfoys to turn up. At first, his father replied with a harsh 'Not a chance in hell,' but was soon convinced when Draco mentioned that the Weasley's would be coming, and how embarrassing it would be for him, if his Wife's family turned up, and his own mother and father couldn't. His father sent another surprisingly quick owl saying how they'd be delighted to dine with them on Christmas, and Draco smirked at his own ingenuity. A Malfoy would never embarrass a Malfoy.

"Your Mother's looking a little glass-eyed."

Draco turned in the direction of his mother, who was swaying dangerously close to the Christmas tree. She had an empty glass clasped in her grip, and was nodding continuously at something Arthur Weasley seemed to be saying. "Maybe we should keep her away from the mead." Draco replied, frowning as Narcissa tottered into a nearby wall for support.

Draco glanced around the room, a blur of redheads, laughing and drinking merrily. Draco scowled at all the damn Christmas spirit cluttering up his house. "Cheer up, it's Christmas." Draco turned to the owner of the pathetically cheery voice, and was met with a face littered with freckles, and an enormous, sappy grin. "You must be Charlie." Draco said, offering out his hand. Charlie spluttered, and suddenly pulled Draco into a fumbling hug. "We're related now, no need for handshakes." Charlie replied, when he finally released the startled blond. "Of course," Draco said, still fazed by the physical contact between himself and Ginny's over friendly brother. He'd have to keep his eye on that Charlie.

A burst of clapping suddenly silenced the babble of people in the living room, and all eyes were on Ginny. "Dinner is served, so if you'd like to make your way into the dining room." The gathering in the living room excitedly shifted into the dining room, confusion ensuing as they tried to find their correct seats. "Mum, not next to Ron, you're placed next to Narcissa." Draco rolled his eyes. His wife was intent on forcing the two families to bond. "Bill, you're not joined to Fleur at the hip, you're placed next to Lucius." Ginny said, as she pushed Percy aside. Lucius was stricken at the sight of Bill, who gangly made his way next to him. Draco smirked. His father was eying Bill apprehensively, as if he was a foreign creature, one complete with firery long hair, and an awful earring. "Draco, you're at the head of the table." Ginny said pointing to the opposite end of the room. He couldn't help but smile proudly, as he shuffled past his mother, who was having trouble trying to stay upright in her chair.

Ginny began placing plates in front of their guests. "Narcissa would you like some water?" she asked, as Narcissa was now resting her head against Percy's shoulder for support, and dribbling in response. "Here, Bill, just how you like it." Ginny said, placing a plate of raw gammon in front of Bill, much to the dismay of Lucius, who was staring wide eyed, as if he would transform and maul everyone present.

A clatter of metal, followed by a high pitched screeched caused Draco to wince. Fleur who was cussing rapidly in French, was sporting an ugly crimson splodge on her once beautiful dress. "For Merlin's sake, George!" Molly cried out, swotting at her son across the table. "Calm down, it's alright, oh, it's only a bit of sauce!" Ginny shouted above the aggressive French, trying desperately to restore the peace. Draco sighed and pulled out his wand, pointing it at the cranberry mess on Fleur. Muttering a quick cleaning spell, the sauce vanished, making Fleur abruptly stop her ranting. Looking over at his wife, he was met with a thank-you smile, one that Draco knew would score him points later on tonight. Dinner surprisingly carried on without a hitch, and with the never ending flow of alcohol, Draco found that the Weasley's company wasn't as bad as he thought.

"Everyone, take a cracker!" came the voice of his slighty tipsy wife, who was tottering around the table handing out huge velvet black crackers. Draco took a cracker, and looked at the object in his hand confused. Realising his wife's mistake, he quickly stood, but it was too late. Bill was pulling a cracker with Fleur across the table, both laughing as a loud crack echoed through the dining room, and purple smoke erupted from the cracker. When the smoke finally cleared, all eyes turned on Lucius. There upon his head, was a lacy black thong, the prize from within the cracker. His father was stunned into silence, and Draco groaned at his impulse purchase at Hogsmeade; _Crackers for a Couple's First Christmas. _The situation wasn't helped when Ron and the twins erupted into roaring laughter, causing Lucius to quickly remove the thong from his head, and turn an angry shade of pink. "Right, everyone into the living room!" Ginny called above the laughter, who was bright scarlet and shame faced. "Draco, we had no idea you were into that." Called Fred from across the table, as Ron and George burst into another round of laughter. The dining room cleared, and Draco remained, still rooted form the spot, staring at the lacy underwear next to his father's plate. A light snoring made Draco look down, and he was met with the sight of a sleeping Arthur Weasley, drooling onto the tablecloth. Draco sighed in relief that Ginny's father had missed the spectacle.

**_XXX_**

After the thong incident, everyone decided that getting incredibly drunk would be the best way to forget it ever happened. Ginny decided that avoiding her husband would be the right thing to do, as if she got within two feet of him, she realised she was likely to murder him. "You know Lucius," A drunken Molly Weasley shouted very loudly, "I really do think you could do with a haircut." Lucius shook his head ferociously, making the glass of fire whiskey in his hand slurp onto the floor. "Narcissa thinks I look sexy with my hair long." He replied a little too loudly. Draco spluttered on his mead upon hearing this, and made a mental note to sort his father out with a haircut as soon as possible.

Draco's shame only escalated, as his mother, who grabbed a length of disgusting pink tinsel from the tree, began dancing to music only she could hear, and sashayed around the living room with the tinsel draped around her neck. "Really, mother!" Draco cried, standing a little too quickly, and had to grab Hermione for support. "Shake your tinsel, Mrs Malfoy!" Came the cheers from a very drunken George Weasley, who proceeded to take Narcissa by the hand and twirl her around. "George!" Ginny slurred, as she tottered towards her brother. "Stop it, you're making a farce of our Christmas!" Slipping on Lucius' previously spilled drink, Ginny slipped on the puddle, threw her glass of wine into the air, and landed with a thud on the floor. Draco stood there, amid the chaos that was the Malfoy-Weasley Christmas, and wished that he'd sent everyone home after the incident with the thong.

"Get me up Draco, bloody Hell!" Ginny shouted from her heap on the floor. Draco swore loudly and bent down to pick up his drunken spouse. "Merlin, Ginny, you shouldn't of eaten so much stuffing." Ginny began to shout incoherent abuse at her husband, who was now trying to deal with his dancing mother. "Photo time, everyone!" Called Percy Weasley, who was holding a camera above his head. "You have got to be kidding me!" Draco called as nobody listened. "Ron, Harry, put on these!" Molly called, handing Ron and Harry assorted Christmas hats. The bedlam in the living room was sorting themselves into some sort of order for the photograph; putting on Christmas hats and wrapping tinsel about themselves. Charlie was trying to wrestle Hermione's hair under an elf hat, and soon settled for a pair of antlers. "Draco, put on this hat," Ginny ordered. Draco sniffed at the scarlet Santa hat in his Wife's hand. "You are joking, aren't you Gin?" Ginny huffed and thrust the hat under Draco's nose. "Put on the hat Draco, it's the least you can do!"

"No."

"Draco Malfoy, if you do not put this hat on your head this instant, I will use that _lovely_ pink tinsel to throttle you!"

Swearing loudly, and shouting abuse at Christmas spirit, Draco begrudgingly put on the Santa hat, and took his place beside his wife. "Quick, Percy, get your father!" Molly called as Percy set the timer on the camera. "Ow, Hermione, don't move your head, your antlers almost had my eye out!" Ron called just as Percy returned with a dazed Arthur. "Smile!" someone called, and the flash clicked, capturing the first ever Malfoy-Weasley Christmas in time.

"Draco, I don't feel so good." The blond looked down at his wife, who had turned a grim shade of pale, and gripped onto his arm for support. Draco groaned, as Ginny proceeded to empty her stomach all over the floor, making it a lovely addition to their wonderful first Christmas.

_**XXX**_

"Was I really that drunk?"

Draco laughed and nodded. He looked over his Wife's shoulder, who was holding the photograph from Christmas Day in her hands. He could see a yawning Arthur Weasley being nudged by Molly, the Twins pulling silly faces, while his mother's head was lolled against his father, who had a strained smile on his face. Smiling at the scene, he cast his eyes to himself and Ginny, who was noticeably swaying, while he was half smiling, half scowling at the camera, trying to keep Ginny still. "You made a lovely mess of the floor too." Draco added, giving Ginny's waist a squeeze. She smiled and put the photography back on the mantle. "It wasn't that bad was it?" she asked, turning to face him.

The house had just about been restored to normal, but the image of his father wearing a thong as a headdress would be forever burned in his mind. Pulling Ginny close to him he kissed her forehead. "It was absolute madness." He said, chuckling at the memory. Ginny smiled and looked up at him. "Good, because I plan on doing it all again, next year."

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**List of 'Crazy Must Haves'**

_**- All the Weasley and Malfoys under one roof**_

_**- An odd seating arrangement (Ron Weasley sitting next to Lucius Malfoy etc..)**_

_**- Ginny burning food**_

_**- Draco forced to wear a Santa hat**_

_**- Pink tinsel**_

_**- A drunk Narcissa Malfoy**_

_**- Draco must say: "Ginny, when I'm sober I hate your family. So, for this day to go smoothly I suggest you give me back that bottle."**_

_**- Ginny must say: "Oh, it's only a bit of sauce!"**_

_**- A black thong landing on Lucius Malfoy's head.**_

_**- Molly telling Lucius he should cut his hair.**_

_**- Arthur falling asleep at the table.**_

_R&R appreciated. ;)_


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